Just When You Think You Had A Bad Day This Happens…
- March 28, 2017
- Theresa Bertuzzi
Blah!!! I’m sick. My kids shared a lovely cold with me that started out as a cold but has now turned into what I think must be malaria!!! Everything hurts, I have a fever and I can barely get up and down the stairs. Full blown flare up! I am even having trouble moving my fingers to type this post. Hope this goes away when the cold does. Six months ago my doctors told me to brace myself because it could be a few years before they get me into some sort of remission and it would be a long road with tons of ups and downs. I was like “aghhh, two years, no problem! I can do that!” Six months in and I found myself yesterday throwing a tantrum in the living room because I felt like crap and can’t stand it anymore. LOL No one was home but my son saw my red, blotchy face when he got home and asked me if I was ok. I had to laugh and tell him the truth… “I just threw a tantrum because I feel like crap and because spring has decided never to make its appearance!!!!” This has been the longest most horrible winter ever.
I started feeling really terrible yesterday and woke up with a fever. I was like “no way!!! Is this cold going to get in my way!” so I headed back to the gym for the first time Like a spoiled kid that was going to do the exact opposite of what she really should be doing. I managed to ride the bike for a full hour and do some very light weights and I was so proud of myself. Then I got home and couldn’t stand up out of the car! LOL Oooopsss! I blame the cold, not the gym. It was great getting back to the gym and feeling like a normal human being again.
The funny thing about this stupid disease is that I can feel absolutely terrible and look perfectly normal. Even when I am feeling my worst I will glance in the mirror expecting to see a skeleton or zombie and I just see my round cheeks. I even look a little healthier when I am really sick as I get a nice flush going on from the rash that I get from the flare up. I assume this is the same for everyone who has autoimmune disease as I see posts all of the time that say “but you don’t look sick!” and yes, I hear that all of the time too. For some reason this irritates some people with chronic illness but I just take it as a compliment. I mean, who wants to look sick anyway? And they are right; I often do not look sick at all until you see my try and climb a flight of stairs. Although, even then I don’t look sick I just look clumsy and spastic. It does seem surreal though when people come up to me when I am feeling terrible and say “you look so good, you must be feeling better.” It happened to me three times last night at hockey and when I got home my fever was sitting at 103 and Danny had to push me upstairs at bedtime. Yet I did look fine. What a weird disease! Anyway, I need to pull myself out of this funk because it really sucks to catch a cold and watch your progress fly out the window. I will keep my fingers crossed that my IV treatments next week will slip me back into a better and healthier place but man have I ever been depressed and grumpy these past few days.
Yesterday I grumbled my way through my day and spent the evening cleaning up dog pee and washing pillows. I was so irritated that the dog has decided to use my daughter’s bedroom as his outdoor pee place. I had to get a grip as now I was getting irritated at the dog which is completely unheard of in my world. He never irritates me! So I took a deep breath and realized he needs a trip to the vet because the last time he did this he had a bladder infection. Poor little guy. A day sick and cleaning up pee was soon put into perspective by someone whom I shall refer to as “a friend” in case she doesn’t want her story to go public. I was getting ready for bed after that horrible day, wondering if my hands still smelled like pee when I get a message from my friend who tells me that she is sick too. She then tells me how she exited her room into a dark hallway, before bed, to see a stuffy lying in the hallway. She kicked the stuffed animal to send it flying out of the way so no one would trip on it when “splat” something went flying across the hallway. Had she killed the stuffy? Did its guts go flying across the hallway? Was this murder??? She zipped into the bathroom to check the damage when the smell hit her. She had just kicked the biggest pile of dog poo down the hall. I mean she splattered it all down the hall, up the walls and all over her leg. This poo was so big that she had scooped off the top few inches onto the top of her foot. AGHHHH!!!!!! I laughed until I cried and suddenly a day cleaning up pee while sick did not seem so bad. Kicking dog poo down the hall while sick is wayyyyy worse!!!! You win my friend, you win! After that I tried to look up a funny meme to send her to cheer her up but when I typed in “stepped in poo” in the search engine pictures that people took of their own large poops began popping up. I started gagging and turned that mess off! I am already feeling nauseous; I can’t handle that kind of a surprise! Although Danny had a good laugh watching me gag while I searched for one. He didn’t find it so funny though when I showed him the pictures of what was making me gag! Ba ha ha! So, sorry friend: no funny meme! Well… Maybe just one!
So I guess we all have to put it into perspective my friends. We may think we are having the worst day ever but it could always be worse… like karate kicking dog poo all over yourself and your hallway.